Monday, August 29, 2011

Hating/Accepting my body

So, a couple years ago I decided to get skinny. I worked at it for a long, long, time and got to a weight that was just a little heavier than my goal weight and I was pretty happy with how I was looking. Then, I got lazy. My work out partner stopped going to my gym and slowly my work out habits faded. I fizzled down to doing just one class a week. Since I had lost much of my weight that I had attributed to baby pounds, I figured it would be easy to maintain. I was wrong. The weight crept back on, little by little, and BAM! None of my skinny jeans fit anymore. I am angry that I let it get to this point. I have never eaten great. I don't eat terrible, but lets be honest, I love carbs and dairy and baked goods. My portions are too big. Yada yada yada. I should probably eat vegetables. You know, that kind of thing. Also, I have been having small bouts of depression. It's pretty normal for me, I just go through periods of low motivation and productivity. Or maybe I'm just lazy. Who knows. At the beginning of May my sister's health began to deteriorate and at the end of May I had a miscarriage just a week after finding out I was pregnant. And because I am an emotional eater, I am sure all of those things affected my increasing chubbiness negatively. The point is, I am overweight again and very unhappy about it. I realized that I am not one of those people that can eat whatever and never work out and still look good. I have to make lifestyle changes and stick to them. That is not easy. But I don't want to be sad when I look in the mirror. I don't care if it seems vain. I used to be fit and strong and I know that I can be. I want to take care of my body.  Last week I went and added childcare to my gym membership and managed to go to the gym 3 times last week. I am hoping to regularly go 3 or 4 times a week and take control of my eating habits as well. Wish me luck!

9 comments:

Kathi said...

you can do it! your workout partner is now motivated again too!!! Get me a pass! :)

Skye said...

I'm sorry, I know how you feel. I have to work really hard to just maintain as well. And I have let myself go. Good luck, hopefully you can motivate me too!

Caroline said...

Good luck!

And you're still cute. With good hair. That has got to count for something.

jckhadlocks said...

The whole situation is frustrating and emotional eating is a hard thing to get a hold of. You can totally get to the weight and look you want!!

Stacey said...

Robin,
I'm in the same boat with you. I have decided to just accept my body...for now. Just know you are loved whatever size you are. I think you are beautiful.
Stacey McDowell

Elizabeth said...

Im so sorry you had a horible hard time in May.
If your library has it check out "Eat to Live" by Joel Fuhrman as he has heaps of great advice about increasing your vegie intake.
Good Luck :-)

Macey said...

Good luck Robin, it is so hard, I can't keep a good thing going either.

jillian said...

its hard! i know! i am one that has to work at it too. i used to be bigger, and now i am happy with my body and it is maintainable. i think a big help is being able to take your kids to the gym! it makes it way easier to get there. honestly, you do have to do a life style change with eating. i used to eat fast food probably 5 times a week and now i never eat it, and never crave it. if you stop eating things eventually you will not crave them anymore. also, with eating good foods...veggies, fruits...you feel an energy that feels amazing! once you feel that, i swear you never want to look back. its do-able! you just have to work at it a little. but if you want it you can TOTALLY do it!!!!

Emily said...

My family has gone almost entirely vegetarian this summer. I find myself eating nuts a lot now, which are high in fat but still good for you. From what I've read it is simple carbs (sugar, white flour, etc.) that is bad for you and not fat, so I'm trying to convince myself of this. A little off topic but still food/nutrition related.