Although I don't work a 9-5 job, my days definitely seem to follow a pattern. I wake up each morning, several times in fact, to feed my beautiful baby. I don't mind feeding her, I enjoy it, but getting her to burp (which usually includes fountains of spit up) and fall back to sleep is the hard part. I usually am awakened from one of my vivid dreams. This morning for example, I woke from a strange, disturbing dream where I was traveling with my cousin Abbie in San Francisco. Well I think that's where it was, i've never actually been there. I was wearing a fake beard and strange disguise, suddenly I realized I had left Tucker behind. I rushed to change back into my own clothes where a strange centipede thing was in my sleeve which Abbie had to save me from. Then I ran down the steep hill and barely saved Tucker from the clutches of a very filthy looking man. Upsetting. I have always had strange dreams. Some of the recurring themes include me smoking cigarettes or drinking wine (which I have never done) and losing my teeth, which I usually try to jam back into my gums and make stick. Okay, I'm a freak.
So, on with my day. Tucker usually wakes a little before 7, requesting cartoons and chocolate milk. Trent takes care of this on Tues and Thurs when he isn't lifting weights to let me stay in bed a bit longer. It doesn't usually last and I come out and eat and get online to check my email,blogs, and the weather forecast. Then I feed and dress Charlotte and Tucker, sometimes I even dress myself at this time-if we will be going somewhere. That somewhere is mainly Walmart. I try to get there before lunch when we go. These days we usually take Trent lunch after shopping and then head home for naps. Sometimes I nap, sometimes I read or clean during this time. My cleaning includes at least one load of laundry a day, usually 2 or 3. I don't get it all folded at once. In fact our guest bed is a home for a never-ending pile of rotating clean laundry. I pick up the living room and kitchen, always littered with clothes (usually Tucker's and Charlotte's and occasionally mine that are drenched in spit up-okay Trent dumps shoes in every room too), diapers, food wrappers, sippy cups, toys, and other random items. Tucker is very good at entertaining himself with toys or coloring or books and singing to himself during my many feeding and burping times with Charlotte. His potty training does not seem to be moving forward anymore, when I put him in big boy underwear he seems to have more accidents and the changing pants all day is very tiring. But we go on. The weather hasn't really permitted us to play outside much although yesterday we went to the park which was great for all 3 of us. At about 4:30 I start looking at the clock hoping it is getting close to time for Trent to come home. He always says he will be home at 6, but it is always 6:30. I throw together some dinner, Tucker usually has to eat before Trent comes home. Trent comes home, eats, showers, and helps me get the kids to bed. The rest of the night we spend in front of the TV with really no conversation and go to bed. We don't seem to get any quality time together, but Trent doesn't seem to mind. He even has plenty of things to fill his Saturdays. So when I feel lonely or isolated I tend to call a friend or sister or my mom and then I have absolutely nothing interesting to say which makes me feel like even a bigger loser. Such is the life of Mommies. I have my good days too, don't get me wrong. This is just how it feels a lot of the time.